Therefore you must listen and learn
Feb. 1st, 2007 08:42 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Even in a warzone there are quiet times. Times to sit alone in the cold with the dark thoughts that sneak up on you when no one is there to distract you from them. This is one of those times.
She runs over the fight in the park. Over and over and over she watches it unfold in her mind's eye.
If she had sprayed some suppressing fire at those benches that Red wouldn't have been able to get a clear shot at Timosha.
If she had put a grenade behind those planters Rita wouldn't have been exposed to their fire. She probably could have pulled Timosha out without getting hit.
If she had started running for Old Katarina's position as soon as she stepped through the door, Makita would have spotted the Red with the grenade. She could have taken him down before he threw.
If she'd been carrying an RKG-41 she could have punched through some cover. If she were stronger she could have gotten grenades over the wall. If she were faster she could have gotten around the Red flank.
If, if, if, if, if, if... they'd still be alive. Katarina and Rita. Katya, Sergei, Dmitri, Lara, Olga, Oleg, Lana, Marik, Misha, Filya... The list of her dead is never far.
The sun comes up, but Makita doesn't notice. Another night passes spent in the company of her ghosts.
She runs over the fight in the park. Over and over and over she watches it unfold in her mind's eye.
If she had sprayed some suppressing fire at those benches that Red wouldn't have been able to get a clear shot at Timosha.
If she had put a grenade behind those planters Rita wouldn't have been exposed to their fire. She probably could have pulled Timosha out without getting hit.
If she had started running for Old Katarina's position as soon as she stepped through the door, Makita would have spotted the Red with the grenade. She could have taken him down before he threw.
If she'd been carrying an RKG-41 she could have punched through some cover. If she were stronger she could have gotten grenades over the wall. If she were faster she could have gotten around the Red flank.
If, if, if, if, if, if... they'd still be alive. Katarina and Rita. Katya, Sergei, Dmitri, Lara, Olga, Oleg, Lana, Marik, Misha, Filya... The list of her dead is never far.
The sun comes up, but Makita doesn't notice. Another night passes spent in the company of her ghosts.